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Things to Ponder....

 
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RavenStar


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Location: Worcester, UK

PostPosted: Mon Nov 17, 2008 9:22 pm    Post subject: Things to Ponder.... Reply with quote

Why is it that people say they 'slept like a baby' when babies wake up every two hours?

Why do we press harder on a remote control when we know the batteries are flat?

Why do banks charge a fee on 'insufficient funds' when they know there is not enough?

Why does someone believe you when you say there are four billion stars, but check when you say the paint is wet?

Why do they use sterilized needles for death by lethal injection?

Why doesn't Tarzan have a beard?

Why does Superman stop bullets with his chest, but ducks when you throw a revolver at him?

Why do Kamikaze pilots wear helmets?

Whose idea was it to put an 'S' in the word 'lisp'?

What is the speed of darkness?

Are there specially reserved parking spaces for 'normal' people at the Special Olympics?

If the temperature is zero outside today and it's going to be twice as cold tomorrow, how cold will it be?

If it's true that we are here to help others, what are the others doing here?
Do you cry under water?

How is it that we put man on the moon before we figured out it would be a good idea to put wheels on luggage?

Why do people pay to go up tall buildings and then put money in binoculars to look at things on the ground?

Did you ever stop and wonder......
Who was the first person to look at a cow and say, 'I think I'll squeeze
these pink dangly things here, and drink whatever comes out?'

Who was the first person to say, 'See that chicken there... I'm gonna eat the next thing that comes outta it's bum.'

Why do toasters always have a setting so high that could burn the toast to a horrible crisp, which no decent human being would eat?

Why is there a light in the fridge and not in the freezer?

Why do people point to their wrist when asking for the time, but don't point to their bum when they ask where the bathroom is?

Why does your Obstetrician, Gynaecologist leave the room when you get undressed if they are going to look up there anyway?

Why does Goofy stand erect while Pluto remains on all fours? They're both dogs!

If quizzes are quizzical, what are tests?

If corn oil is made from corn, and vegetable oil is made from vegetables, then what is baby oil made from?

If electricity comes from electrons, does morality come from morons?

Why do the Alphabet song and Twinkle, Twinkle Little Star have the same tune?

(Stop singing and read on . . . . . . . . .!!)

Did you ever notice that when you blow in a dog's face, he gets mad at you, but when you take him on a car ride, he sticks his head out the window?

Does pushing the elevator button more than once make it arrive faster?





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Koko


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PostPosted: Wed Nov 19, 2008 3:31 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

Oh those are some oldies, but goodies.  Thanks for the smile!
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SageCat


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Location: Suffolk, UK

PostPosted: Wed Nov 19, 2008 12:17 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

Thanks RS ............... I love these!  File under 'More of Life's Mysteries'!!  
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Minty


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Location: South East London, UK

PostPosted: Thu Nov 20, 2008 6:01 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

They were great...loved the one about Tarzan



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